17.6.09

Long Time No See

I know it's been a long time since I've posted anything. I wish I could say it's because I've been so busy doing so many amazing things, but actually it's because my life is horribly boring to me so I'm sure no one else wants to read about it.

I'm going to try and find things that are mildly fun to do so that I can post about them, but I can't make any promises. We're not in Europe anymore Toto. We haven't been for almost an entire year.

However, for your enjoyment I have my new favorite website to offer:

www.notalwaysright.com

It's all ridiculous stories of customer service. I have plenty of my own, but due to the confidential nature of the place I work I can't share them. Such a pity too... it's amazing how dumb people are sometimes, especially for people who managed to make it to college.

But here's one of my favorite stories so far from the website:

Customer Service | Florida, USA

Customer: “I need some help locating the item that this coupon advertises. I’ve looked everywhere and just can’t find it.”

Me: “Let’s see if I can help you here…” *looks at the coupon* “I’m sorry ma’am, we don’t sell this item anymore.”

Customer: “Why not? I have a coupon for it. I wanted to get it for my husband for his birthday next week.”

Me: “Ma’am, this coupon was expired fifteen years ago. They no longer make this product.”

Customer: “Can’t you go look for one? I really need it, it would be perfect for him.”

Me: “…sure! It just so happens that I developed a machine that can warp the space/time continuum. Would you like to accompany me on the trip or would you like to stay here?”

Customer: “REALLY? Thank you so much! I’ll stay here and wait for you.”

(I go into the back room for a couple of minutes to let my manager know what I’m about to do, then come back out running.)

Me: “MA’AM! RUN FOR YOUR LIFE! I MESSED UP AND WENT BACK TOO FAR! I ENDED UP GOING BACK TO THE AGE OF THE DINOSAURS AND THERE’S A PISSED-OFF VELOCIRAPTOR RIGHT BEHIND ME!”

Customer: “OH NO! I’LL GO CALL THE POLICE!” *runs out of the store*

(I went back to my manager after the customer ran off, and he was literally rolling on the ground laughing.)


Have a fabulous weekend!

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